Compiled by Dae

Xander: Private Harris reporting for Oz watch.

Xander:Oh! 'Call of the Wild.' Aren't we reading the Cliff Notes to this for English?

Xander: No worries. I can handle the Oz Full Monty. I mean, not 'handle' handle, like 'hands to flesh' handle.

Buffy: [about Scott Hope] But my most favorite thing so far is that he doesn't seem to be any kind of Hell Beast.

Buffy: We have a marching jazz band?
Oz: Yeah, but, you know, since the best jazz is improvisational, we'd be going off in all directions, banging into floats... Scary.
Willow: He's just being Oz.
Oz: Pretty much full-time.

Giles:R ight. It's good to see you. Um, no need to panic.
Oz: Just a thought - poker: not your game.

Mr. Platt: Let's start with why you ran away.
Buffy: That's a long story.
Mr. Platt: Mm. Bore me.

Oz: Okay. Uh, you know that thing where you bail in the middle of an upsetting conversation? I have to do that. It's kinda dramatic, I know, but... sometimes, it's a necessary guy thing.

Xander: We're doing crime here. You don't sneak up during crime.

Willow: [to Buffy] How come you're the Wakey Girl? I mean, this time, it's not your boyfriend who's the cold-blooded-- [Oz walks up] Jelly doughnut?

Scott: Hey. Uh... I can't back you on that lunch. Nutritional demerits.
Buffy: Oh. My stomach doesn't want hard food today. [points at the green Jell-O] But there's fruit in it.
Scott: Those are marshmallows.

Scott: I hope you realize I don't actually know these people. I just...I thought you would like me better if I had friends, so I hired them.

Giles: Our task now is to determine what sort of killer we are dealing with. Clearly, we're looking for a depraved, sadistic animal.
Oz: [comes in] Present. Hey, I may be a cold-blooded jelly doughnut, but my timing is impeccable.

Giles: All right. We'll split up. Um, Faith, you and I team. Willow, stick with Buffy.
Oz: And I'll... go lock myself in the cage.

Buffy: It's tricky, covering a fresh shiner like that. You know what works?
Debbie: What?
Buffy: Don't get hit.

Debbie: He does love me. He does love me.
Buffy: This is useless. We have to go. I have to find Pete.
Debbie: He does love me.
Willow: Come on.
Debbie: He does love me.
Willow: I think we broke her.
Debbie: He does love me. He does love me.
Buffy: I think she was broken before this.

Oz: Time's up. Rules change.

Cordelia: Pete was a monster? Where have I been?
Xander: In your special place, Cor, which is why I adore you.

Cordelia: So it was like a real killing. He wasn't under the influence of anything?
Buffy: Just himself.
Cordelia: Great. Now I'm gonna be stuck with serious thoughts all day.

Scott: It's just that you never really know what's going on inside somebody. Do you? I mean, you think...if you care about them...But you never really do.